Lost women who claim to be proud single mothers are everywhere around us today. No single mother is proud, or should be proud. Those who are, or think they are, should check themselves into a mental institution.
Sadly, the old type of single mother got there mainly as a result of unguided experimenting with sex. I sympathize with them. They spread their legs too fast too soon. Their leg spreading results into unplanned pregnancies. I say unplanned because no pregnancy is unwanted. If you did not want to get pregnant, you should have kept your legs under lock and key.
Anyway, after these ladies got pregnant, they either lacked the connections to procure an abortion or were too afraid of undergoing one. Others did not just have the money. That is how they ended up giving birth to bastards who they cannot raise. Grandmothers find themselves involuntarily taking care of their grandchildren.
The old breed of single mothers is dying out slowly. Their whole crop of bastard children faces an identity crisis. They cannot figure out who they are, or what their roles in society should be. It is this crop of lost bastards that is slowly giving rise to the second generation of clueless single mothers. The single mothers also end up being the worst disciplinarians.
Girls brought up by single mothers are a generally lost lot. They lack confidence in their ability to make good wives. Spoiled beyond measure, poorly brought up and excessively proud, they forget that beauty fades. You will find ‘slay queen’ in their social media bios. Additionally, they have been brought up to embrace useless ‘independent lady’ mindsets. Most are taught that men are ‘untrustworthy dogs’ who are natural enemies to women. Would such a girl be in a hurry to get married?
On their end, boys brought up by single mothers do not know how to be husbands. They cannot steer a family for a day, let alone decades. They do not understand concepts of Family, and how to be in one as a head – or as a man.
Do not think that these people are completely and totally isolated from family and society. They have uncles and aunts who can step in and share a word of advice now and then. But in our modern society, you only meet your extended family during burials and weddings (BnW).
Other times, it is a quick hello at the random poorly-attended get-together. Then you quickly and quietly slink away before Uncle Mathenge tries to get a Kshs 200/= note from you. Useless you! Cliques are formed, based on financial might, to attend birthdays and graduations (BnG) within the extended family. One older generation lacks the opportunity to pass tips and advice to the next younger one.
Rise of the New Single Mothers Breed
Another breed of ‘independent ladies’ are those who grew up in a proper family setup, but were given too much freedom. This excess freedom gets into their heads at the wrong time in their lives. They take examples from Martha Karua and Charity Ngilu who they see as strong ladies. What they do not keep in their lazy minds is that M. Karua and C. Ngilu have husbands who they go to at the end of the day.
Put together the above 3 types of young men and women to get your perfect recipe for disaster. When these people meet, the ladies are not willing to be married. Yet, deep inside their hearts they want male companionship! The boys they ‘funga’ in noisy nightclubs as companions are not ready to be husbands, but they want the soft pillows of a woman’s breasts.
And the Cycle Continues
Hormones take over, leading to condoms being cast aside. Natural urges are dangerous when there is inadequate parental guidance to caution and curtail the chances of sexual activity happening. The ladies spread their legs ‘too fast, too soon’ too, to complete the cycle started by their mothers. It is as if they are competing with their mothers about who loses their virginity at the youngest age. The boys are all too ready to pump away between the girls’ legs. Bastard babies result, to be brought up by single mothers and grandmothers.
Oh, did I forget to mention that the boys have perfected the art of slinking away? Since they are always hopping from one partner to the next, they disappear even before the lady misses her first period? Bure kabisa!